Let’s Have Football World Cups Run Longer. And Happen More Often

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Alexander Nekrassov writes: As the World Cup in Russia approaches, well sort of approaches as there are still nearly 1000 days left, let me throw a juicy bone to all you millions of people who have no interest in football whatsoever: why not push for staging the World Cup more often, not every four years but every two or even every year? And why not increase the number of teams playing from 32, as things stand now, to 64 or even 128 and have 8 or even 12 weeks of football excitement?

And before anyone says things like ‘Are you mad?’, let me tell you something: when World Cups happen the overwhelming majority of undesirables are hooked on watching the box endlessly, in the comfort of the hellholes they call their ‘homes’, or at their locals with their mates. And that means, you see, less ugly mugs hanging around, getting drunk and screaming their heads off, while terrorising individual passers-by and whole communities. And if it takes a World Cup to get so many hoodlums off the streets for long periods of time, then I’m all for these great events to be running for longer periods of time and happen more often.

People who say they don’t like football and dread the World Cup fever are missing the big picture. The competition does what no police force in the world can do: it helps keep millions of hoodlums occupied. It’s a time of bliss for many law abiding citizens around the world. Apart from the host-countries, obviously, that gets some of the worst possible people gathering together. But that’s the price they pay for making all that money out of the competition.

If I’d had it my way, I’d introduce big football competitions running one after another, with full repeats thrown in after they end. You might not know this, but there is a vast audience out there that would gladly watch repeats of old matches on the box – over and over again. As long as the beer is in abundance and like-minded people are present to share their thoughts on the game. Many of them would probably watch a fish tank on the box as well, but that is beside the point. And the point is that football should be on the box all the time, all over the world, non-stop, 24 hours a day, with biggest competitions played as often as possible.

So that is why I welcome the World Cup in Russia and hope that most people, who don’t give a damn who wins, would have a great time and get out more.

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